A very close friend of mine once said. ”You know, as long as I have known you…”
He’s known me for about 30 years.
“…Every few months or so, you get pent up with a bunch of angst and frustration. Unleashing it in an explosion of creativity.”
Of which, none of the aftermath lead to anything productive or helpful in any way. It was in fact an emotional vomiting of confined angst.
He brought this up because, I was discussing the blog with him. He knows me well, he’s seen my childish and sometimes stupid attempts at what I thought would lead to success. He was by his own admission, worried, that this was going to play out in the same vein.
I tried to be a rapper once. When I say I tried. I really mean I made “Beats” on my computer with a cheap $15 program I bought online. Then I bought a mic and a mixer. Started writing “songs”, then recording them and ear beating friends and family with them.
Everyone was very nice and listened. Some said they liked it. Most just nodded their heads, brushing me off, like a kid who wandered into the kitchen, during a dinner party.
I didn’t think it was that bad. Definitely thought I was going to turn it into something. Definitely didn’t. Also, I’m a white guy in a smaller town, in Canada, with no way to gain street cred aside from J walking. Which doesn’t hold to much weight in the grand scheme of things.
From there I ended up trying stand up comedy. Went down to a comedy club on amateur night and tried out a 5 minute set. I remember going up saying something about my sister and the crowd laughing. As I got into my act, slowly the laughter died off, I rambled some things that made the least amount of sense possible. When the finish light came on, I exited stage left and kept going right out the door.
After the show I watched the tape. YUP! I had a friend of mine record it. When I watched it back. It wasn’t as bad as it felt. Not great. But the difference between the feeling I felt when I was up there, was not at all representative of what I saw on the tape. I was definitely better at that than rapping. I was just too self conscious on stage. Maybe if I had kept trying it I could have done alright.
Then for a long time I just sucked up the angst produced by the lack of outlet. That generally meant, at some point the powder keg was going to erupt. I erupted in the wrong places, at the wrong times and sometimes on the wrong people. Venting with friends is a good way to cleanse your psyche, sometimes you need more though.
If you’re anything like me you need a creative outlet.
Something that allows you control, something your own. Something that is built from you, from concept to completion, something that sets all your senses on fire and leaves you satisfyingly drained by the end of it.
If I can’t keep the creativity inside me at bay. It manifests in frustration and anger. When I was young I had sports to unleash it. Now I work out, that definitely helps. Starting this blog helped even more. It has given me an outlet for creativity, challenged me mentally and even pushed my physical limits.
It gives me everything I need to keep those creative gargoyles at bay. It’s also given me the ability to redirect impatience and frustration with others. Bringing me back to the fun loving, silliness that is me.
In getting to this point I realized something was missing. It would be a simple addition and a nice compliment to the the blog. Plus it affords me another creative outlet, a place to give to you a little more depth of me.
I started a YouTube channel!!
I only have a couple short videos up right now. So check them out.
Here is the link:
Subscribe for laughs. If you don’t laugh, I’m pretty sure you have no soul.
Aside from putting together skits and trying to make you laugh or smile. I’m also going to discuss some of the topics I’ve talked about here. Try to get a little more in depth and of course just like my blog posts, talk about the every day occurrence that present challenges to my personal development, motivation and growth. Hopefully providing useful and effective insight and advice to common life issues.
I hope you enjoy the content on this blog.
I really hope you enjoy what I’m creating for YouTube. Click the channel links in this article to view the videos.
Subscribe, leave comments on the blog and on the YouTube channel. Let me know what you think, what you want to see and some of the topics you would like discussed.
Can’t wait for your feed back.
Have an amazing Monday and make sure you laugh!